Ways to increase self-esteem. Increasing self-esteem: tips and tricks. How to get rid of low self-esteem

Having high self-esteem is, of course, good, but achieving it is not so easy. Part of the problem is that this indicator is unstable: one day it can skyrocket, and the next it can drop to nowhere. The situation is even more complicated when we try to evaluate ourselves in specific areas of life (family, sports, work). For example, if dinner is not tasty enough, a chef will be much more upset than a person for whom cooking is not an important aspect of his identity.

It is important to know when to stop: high self-esteem can make a person very vulnerable. He will feel great most of the time, but any criticism will cause a strong reaction. And this greatly inhibits a person’s psychological development.

If you are still very far from such problems and would like to increase your own self-esteem, then follow our advice.

1. Use affirmations correctly

Self-hypnosis formulas are very popular, but they have a significant drawback. They often make people with low self-esteem feel even worse. Why? When self-esteem is low, statements like “I will be a huge success!” strongly contradict a person’s inner beliefs.

Oddly enough, affirmations most often work for people who already have good self-esteem.

But how can you make them work for you if your self-esteem leaves much to be desired? Pronounce more believable formulas. For example, instead of “I will achieve great success!” Tell yourself, “I will try my best until I achieve what I want.”

2. Identify your areas of expertise and develop them

Self-esteem is based on actual achievements in those areas of life that are important to you. If you feel proud of yourself when you cook a delicious dinner, invite guests over often and treat them to something delicious. If you are a good runner, apply for and train for a competition. Determine what areas you are competent in and look for opportunities to highlight them.

3. Learn to accept compliments

People with low self-esteem desperately need compliments, but at the same time do not know how to respond to them correctly.

Accept compliments even if they make you feel awkward.

The best way to avoid the knee-jerk reaction of denying all the good things people say about you is to prepare a simple set of responses and practice saying them automatically every time you receive a compliment. For example, say “Thank you!” or “That’s so nice of you.” Over time, the desire to deny compliments will disappear, and this is a clear indicator that your self-esteem is rising.

4. Stop criticizing yourself, be gentler

If you constantly criticize yourself, your self-esteem becomes even lower. To regain self-esteem, you need to replace criticism with self-compassion.

Every time you are unhappy with yourself, ask yourself what you would say to your best friend in that situation. As a rule, we feel more compassion for our friends than for ourselves. But if you learn to encourage yourself in difficult circumstances, you can avoid lowering your self-esteem due to a critical attitude.

5. Convince yourself of your own worth.

The following exercise will help you restore your self-esteem after it has been severely damaged.

Make a list of your qualities that are important in the context of the situation. For example, if you are refused a date, make a list of qualities that will help you create a good relationship in the future (tolerance, caring, emotionality). If you were unable to get a promotion at work, indicate the traits that make you a valuable employee (responsibility, hard work, creativity). Then select one of the items on the list and briefly explain why you are proud of this quality and why it will be appreciated by others in the future.

Try this exercise once a week or whenever you need a boost to your self-esteem.

    • Functions of self-esteem and their role
    • “Symptoms” of low self-esteem
    • Signs of “healthy” (high) self-esteem
    • Reason #1. Mistakes of upbringing in the family
    • Reason #2. Frequent failures in childhood
    • Reason #3. Lack of clear life goals and drives
    • Reason #4. Negative social environment
    • Reason #5. Health problems and appearance flaws
    • Method number 1. Change your environment and try to communicate more with successful people
    • Method number 2. Attending special trainings, seminars and other events
    • Method No. 3. Don't be afraid to take unusual actions
    • Method number 4. Avoid excess self-criticism
    • Method No. 5. Sports and healthy lifestyle
    • Method number 6. Listening to affirmations regularly
    • Method No. 7. Keep a diary of personal successes and achievements
  • 9. Conclusion

What is the essence and importance of the concept of “self-esteem”. “The most important thing is how you see yourself.” This statement is the absolute truth, it is almost impossible to disagree with it.

Indeed, any victory, from the most insignificant to a brilliant triumph, is undoubtedly the result of the fact that at a certain stage of his life a person absolutely sincerely believed in himself, correctly assessed his own importance, and gained firm faith in the power of his capabilities.

In this article you will learn:

  • What is self-esteem?
  • How to increase self-esteem and self-confidence? And how to develop it?
  • Does self-esteem influence human behavior?

We will also discuss how most people evaluate themselves and how the course of their lives depends on their sense of self.

Increasing self-confidence - 7 ways to increase self-esteem

1. What is self-esteem: definition and its impact on our lives

Self-esteem - this is an individual’s opinion about the importance and significance of his own personality in relation to other people, as well as his assessment of personal qualities - shortcomings and advantages.

Undoubtedly, for the full harmonious functioning of an individual in a social environment, objective self-esteem is necessary.

Without a healthy sense of self and understanding of the value of one’s own personality, a person’s achievement of many life goals - success in society, career growth and advancement, sufficient self-realization, material wealth, harmony in the family, spiritual well-being - becomes completely impossible. (Read also the article - and money into your life, there you will find all the popular ways to attract money)

Functions of self-esteem and their role

Self-esteem performs the following functions:

  • Protective– guarantees a certain independence of the individual himself from outside opinions;
  • Regulatory– provides an opportunity to solve problems of personal preference;
  • Developmental– initiates an impetus for personal improvement.

In the early stages of self-esteem formation, the paramount importance, of course, is child personality assessment those around us - primarily parents, as well as educators and teachers, friends and peers.

Under ideal conditions, self-esteem should be determined only by the individual’s own opinion of himself, but in society this is impossible. A person is in constant psychological interaction with other people, and, therefore, his development as an individual and the formation of his self-esteem are influenced by countless factors.

According to psychologists and experts, ideal self-esteemthis is an extremely accurate and correct assessment of a person’s own abilities. This is extremely important!

After all, if self-esteem is low, then it forces a person to constantly doubt the choice of this or that decision, think for a long time, be afraid and, often, make the wrong choice. But too high self-esteem, on the contrary, leads to the fact that a person’s decisions are unjustifiably bold, sometimes even daring, do not correspond to the potential of his capabilities, and this also leads to making a huge number of serious life mistakes.

Yet, more often than not, psychologists are faced with the problem of people underestimating their strengths and capabilities. Such a person is completely unable to properly reveal his potential, while he is absolutely unaware of where his problem lies, makes more and more mistakes due to constant self-doubt, and does not understand at all how to raise self-esteem. Due to the constant feeling of the meaninglessness of their existence, people with low self-esteem are often unsuccessful, poor, and unhappy.

One of the fairly common pathological manifestations of low self-esteem is inferiority complex .

2. Learn to respect and love yourself - this is immensely important!

Raising self-esteem means learning to respect yourself, to love yourself, i.e. accept yourself exactly as you are, with all your inherent shortcomings and vices. It is precisely in order to understand how to gain self-confidence and develop it that we wrote this article, since confidence and self-esteem are closely intertwined.

How to become confident? How to develop confidence?

It has long been a known fact that ideal people simply do not exist. We all have flaws. But a self-confident person differs from a constantly hesitant, indecisive and insecure person in that he notices not only his shortcomings, but also remembers the advantages that every person probably also has. In addition, a confident person is undoubtedly able to present himself favorably in society.

If you don't love yourself, who else will take on such responsibility? How can other people love you? There is an interesting psychological phenomenon - consciously and subconsciously people always strive for contacts and communication with confident people. It is these people who are most often preferred as business partners, friends, and life partners.

If you tend to doubt yourself and reproach yourself for every little thing, you automatically program yourself for further failures, failures and make the decision-making process even more difficult.

Finally learn to notice your strengths, remember your achievements , do not hesitate to praise yourself once again. Forgive yourself minor failures and troubles, love and respect yourself – and soon you will notice how the attitude of others towards you will change.

Self-esteem and self-confidence are very important characteristics when applying for a job. Therefore, we also recommend reading the article when applying for a job."

“Symptoms” of low self-esteem

A person with low self-esteem often exhibits symptoms such as:

  • excessive self-criticism, constant dissatisfaction with oneself;
  • excessive sensitivity to criticism from other people, strong dependence on the judgments and opinions of others;
  • an irresistible desire to please people, to invariably be useful in some way;
  • pronounced fear of making mistakes, slowness and a tendency to endless doubts when making a significant decision;
  • inexplicable jealousy, irresistible envy of the success of others;
  • hidden hostility towards others;
  • an attitude of constant defensiveness, the need to constantly explain and justify decisions made and actions taken;
  • pessimism, negativism, a tendency to see oneself and everything around in gloomy tones;

A person with low self-esteem often perceives temporary difficulties and minor everyday failures as permanent, and makes appropriate negative and, what is noteworthy, incorrect conclusions regarding existing potential and future opportunities.

The worse we perceive ourselves, the less we respect ourselves, the more negative the attitude of people around us towards us. And this will inevitably lead to alienation, detachment and isolation, and therefore a tendency to depression and many other psycho-emotional disorders.

3. Self-confidence and high self-esteem are an integral factor in achieving success in life!

Some people consider selfishness to be a sin, or at least something negative, something that is best avoided.

But in reality, a person’s lack of self-love and lack of self-esteem is precisely the source of countless complexes and many internal conflicts.

If a person has a low opinion of himself, people around him will never have a different point of view about him. And on the contrary, people with sufficient self-esteem are usually highly valued by others: their opinion is always authoritative and weighty, their interests are taken into account, people strive to cooperate with them, make acquaintances, build friendships or start a family.

Thus, having learned to respect ourselves, we will certainly gain the respect of others, and, in addition, we will learn to be sober about the opinions of others about us.

Signs of “healthy” (high) self-esteem

People with good self-esteem have the following positive characteristics:

  • They accept, love and respect their appearance for what it is. And if they find any shortcomings, they sensibly strive to overcome them;
  • They do not question their strengths, they are focused on success and future victories;
  • They are not afraid to take risks, make bold decisions, are more inclined to take action than to think, are not afraid to make mistakes and draw appropriate conclusions, learn from them;
  • They take criticism from others calmly and take compliments calmly;
  • They know how to communicate well with people, are always interested in their opinions and are not afraid to express their own, do not experience timidity, uncertainty and embarrassment when communicating with previously unfamiliar people;
  • They have due respect for the opinions of other people, but they always have and, if necessary, can defend and defend their own point of view;
  • Take care of the health of your body and maintain positive emotional well-being;
  • They strive for self-development, continuous self-improvement, constant acquisition of new impressions, knowledge, experience;
  • They are not inclined to concentrate their attention and dwell on the negative for a long time in the event of any failure or setback.

Strong self-belief and sufficient self-respect- the same irreplaceable factors for achieving success in life and human happiness as water and sun for plant growth. Without them, personal progress is impossible. After all, low self-esteem completely deprives a person of any prospects and even the slightest hope for the future. positive changes .

4. Factors of low self-esteem - 5 main reasons

There are an immense number of factors that directly or indirectly influence the development of our sense of self. A small role is played by genetic characteristics and hereditary predisposition, but environmental factors still have a much greater decisive influence.

Let's analyze the five most common reasons for a person to develop low self-esteem.

Reason #1.

Mistakes of upbringing in the family

As you know, each of us comes from childhood. And, oddly enough, many of our complexes and negative blocks of our consciousness also come from there. His future life directly depends on the upbringing of a child in childhood. After all, it is in childhood that parents form the “rules” by which a person will live in the future, those “filters” through which he will evaluate what is happening around him. Therefore, the way you raise your child today is a direct mirror image of the kind of person you will get tomorrow.

Believe me, the best, most important and valuable thing that a mother and father can do for the benefit of their children is to teach them to love themselves, to develop in them the proper level of self-esteem.

Self-esteem of a future personality begins its formation in early childhood. At an early age, a child cannot yet independently objectively evaluate the results of his actions and actions, therefore the main source of formation of his opinion about himself is the immediate environment, i.e. most often parents. For a small child, parents are his whole world. If his parents are kind enough to him, the attitude “ good world

If parents in childhood never encourage their children, but, on the contrary, scold, constantly reproach and punish, the child simply will not have any foundation for the development of self-love - the ground on which confidence in their abilities could be formed will be destroyed. We in no way call for connivance, but if you want the best for your children, learn to notice not only their mistakes, but also their achievements. And be sure to pay not only your attention to them, but also the attention of the child. If your child constantly hears from you: “You are incompetent, awkward, a klutz, etc. - this will certainly be deposited in his childhood subconscious, and will leave its negative imprint on the development of his future personality.

Under no circumstances should you constantly compare and contrast your child with other children. Every person, without exception, it's individuality . By comparing a child with someone else, from childhood we infringe on him as an individual and contribute to the development of an inferiority complex in him.

If a child hears too many prohibitions in childhood, endless “ No" And " it is forbidden“- he is already potentially doomed to an unsuccessful life, little income, few friends in the future.

A sharp decrease in self-esteem and a breakdown in confidence in one’s own abilities, words and actions is influenced by parents’ endless criticism of any initiatives, first endeavors and actions. Any positive initiative in childhood should certainly be encouraged! After all, even years later, having long been an adult, a person who was often criticized in childhood subconsciously still continues to be afraid of the same criticism, condemnation of others, and mistakes. Parents, and teachers, educators, coaches, must definitely know how to raise self-esteem and self-esteem for a child who suffers from indecision, doubts and uncertainty.

Optimal method– praise, unobtrusive encouragement. Sometimes it is enough to sincerely praise a child several times for a homework done correctly, a beautifully drawn picture, a poem recited with expression, and his self-esteem will certainly increase.

Do not forget that the center of the world for a child is his family. It is you who are the authors of the foundation of the core of the future personality. Passivity, lack of initiative, apathy, indecision, uncertainty and many other negative traits are a direct reflection of family, especially parental, suggestions, attitudes, and incorrect upbringing models. As a rule, self-esteem is higher among only children in families and among first-born children. For others, the “little brother complex” is common, which occurs when parents endlessly resort to comparing a younger child with an older one.

According to many psychologists , an impeccable family for building good self-esteem is one where the mother is always calm, balanced and in a good mood, and the father is moderately demanding, fair and has undeniable authority.

Reason #2.

Frequent failures in childhood It is well known that our life is changeable and multifaceted, in it success alternates with bad luck, white stripes with black ones, victories with defeats. At some point in time, absolutely every person will face life challenges., troubles problems , banal.

failure

No one is immune from all this, and besides, it contributes to the emergence of life experience, the development of willpower, and the formation of character. But what is undoubtedly important is our own attitude towards the misfortunes we have experienced. And they can especially traumatize the child, since his strength of character has not yet been fully formed.

Any negative event experienced can affect the child’s vulnerable psyche in the form of a lifelong guilt complex and loss of self-esteem. For example

, sometimes children reproach themselves for their parents’ divorce or their endless quarrels, and then the child’s sense of guilt is modified into continuous doubts and inability to make a decision.

In childhood, events that are completely harmless, from the perspective of an adult, often acquire universal proportions. Eg , having won a silver rather than a gold medal in a sports competition, an adult athlete will take a break and continue training even more persistently, and a child may break down, receive psychological trauma and complexes for the rest of his life, especially if parents And trainer

will not show proper understanding of the current situation. Failures and mistakes, ridicule from classmates, rash remarks from adults, especially parents, criticism from teachers. As a result, the teenager gets the wrong idea that he is bad, unlucky, inferior, unlucky, doomed to negativity in advance, and an erroneous feeling of guilt arises for his thoughts, decisions, and actions.

Reason #3.

Lack of clear life goals and drives

If you do not have clear goals that you would like to achieve, positive aspirations, and do not even try to change something for the better, do not make any volitional efforts, then your life will continue to be boring and joyless, gray and monotonous.

Often people who underestimate themselves live “according to a pattern,” half-heartedly “on autopilot.” They have long been accustomed to gray tones, an inconspicuous “mouse” lifestyle, a complete lack of fresh impressions and picturesque colors - and there is absolutely no desire to get out of the established quagmire. Over time, these apathetic people stop even taking proper care of their appearance, resign themselves to a small income, and stop dreaming and craving for something more. Of course, self-esteem in this case is not only low, but completely absent.

Growing up, a person becomes passive and apathetic, and then shifts all problems and troubles onto his wife (husband) when he starts a family. There is only one conclusion:

For such a person there is simply a burning need to increase self-esteem. Otherwise, his life will continue to be painted in extremely gloomy tones, until he himself makes colossal efforts to change his life and, most importantly, himself.

Reason #4.

Negative social environment

Science has proven the existence of mirror neurons - unusual brain cells that tend to become active not only during the performance of a specific action, but also when observing others performing this action. Thus, gradually we become to some extent similar to those who make up our close circle. If there are people around you without specific aspirations and specific life goals, who are in stable spiritual anabiosis, where will you get the craving for internal modifications?, High self-esteem and healthy ambitions are only possible where there are role models. If the people around you, boring passive

If you notice that everyone around you is endlessly complaining about life, constantly gossiping, judging others or slandering others, you need to try cross off these people from the inner circle by all available means. After all, in fact, they can turn out to be an obstacle to improving your creative potential and achieving success.

Reason #5.

Health problems and appearance flaws

Low self-esteem is often characteristic of children and adolescents with defects in appearance or congenital diseases.

Even if parents behave correctly, carefully and tactfully towards a child who has health problems, then peers will probably still leave a negative mark on his sense of self. Common situation

- overweight children, who are often made fun of in the children's group, given various nicknames, often offensive. In this case, catastrophically low self-esteem cannot be avoided unless the necessary measures are taken in a timely manner. Of course, it is worth trying, if possible, to eliminate existing imperfections. If this is unrealistic, try to develop in a person other necessary qualities that would help him become more

resilient, strong, charismatic, funny, capable and confident.

The world knows a lot of examples where people with irreparable physical disabilities and incurable diseases have achieved tremendous success, universal recognition, started good families and live the happiest lives that many have never even dreamed of. (To list a few of them: Carrie Brown, Nick Vujicic, Jessica Long, etc.)

5. How to increase self-esteem and confidence - 7 ways to increase self-esteem

Let's learn to raise self-esteem, develop self-confidence and start loving ourselves! Fortunately, there are a lot of ways to awaken faith in your own strength, but now let's take a closer look at seven of them, in our opinion, quite reliable and effective.

Method number 1.

Change your environment and try to communicate more with successful people If you radically change your social circle and start contacting purposeful, successful, self-confident people, your life is guaranteed to change for the better very quickly. Little by little your sense of self will return dignity, self-respect, determination, courage, self-love .

By communicating with prosperous and successful people, you will begin to appreciate your own individuality, you will begin to use your personal time more carefully, you will certainly find a life goal and you will definitely achieve success on your own.

Method number 2.

Attending special trainings, seminars and other events

In any city, various events, specialized trainings and seminars are held for everyone, at which psychologists help people become more confident and raise their self-esteem. Good specialists with experience in such work will be able to transform a timid, clumsy, indecisive person into a strong, strong-willed, self-satisfied and purposeful person in the shortest possible time. Main

– have a sincere desire and tune in to the upcoming positive changes.

  • If you still do not want to resort to outside help, but are determined to cope with the problem yourself, you should read the following literature:
  • Brian Tracy "Self-Esteem";
  • Andelin Helen "The Charm of Femininity"

etc. (there is a lot of similar literature on the Internet) Method No. 3.

Don't be afraid to take unusual actions

It is human nature to run away from problems and hide in the zone of our usual comfort. This is understandable. It is much easier in difficult situations to calm yourself down by eating a mountain of sweets, a lot of alcohol, or just sitting at home in a chair and feeling sorry for yourself, savoring your own powerlessness. It is many times more difficult to adequately accept the challenge and accomplish something completely unusual for you before. At first it will seem to you that beyond the boundaries of your comfort zone there is an unusual, hostile, alien and inhospitable world, but then you will understand that real life is full bright colors

, unforgettable adventures and positive emotions, is exactly where you have not been before.

Constantly being in familiar conditions is reminiscent of living in a kind of invisible cage, from which you are afraid to leave only because you are accustomed to it and do not know what awaits you outside of it. When will you be able to leave"comfort zone"

and at the same time remain calm, collected and balanced, you will receive a strong incentive to increase self-esteem and create a new, more attractive image.

Nobody is asking you to start with global change. To begin with, for example, instead of returning from work to watch a long-tired boring TV series, visit the gym or visit old friends.- learn an unfamiliar language in six months or meet a pretty girl this evening. Don't be afraid of mistakes! If for the first time everything does not work out smoothly and perfectly, you are still guaranteed a lot of new impressions and increased self-esteem.

Method number 4.

Avoid excess self-criticism

Finally, stop beating yourself up, concentrating on the negative, blaming yourself for mistakes you have made inadvertently, not having an ideal appearance, or yet another failure in your personal life. It will immediately feel much easier for you!

You won’t waste a lot of energy on self-criticism, and you will certainly find time and energy for other, more creative, necessary and worthy tasks. Remember:

whatever you are, you are the only unsurpassed, inimitable and unique person on this huge planet. Why endlessly compare yourself to others? Try to better concentrate on achieving the necessary goals, reconsider your potential and your personal idea of ​​​​happiness.

Open your eyes to the positive qualities of your personality. Find your strengths and constantly work to improve them.

Finally, from any failures of the past, experienced disappointments and mistakes once made, you can extract invaluable benefits, the name of which is worldly wisdom and life experience.

Method No. 5.

Sports and healthy lifestyle

It is known that one of the simplest and most effective methods to increase self-esteem is to actively engage in sports, dancing, physical education, or other activities focused on improving health and well-being. It is no secret that a healthy body has always been known as the seat of a healthy spirit and pure thoughts. By playing sports, a person begins to perceive his appearance less critically and automatically respect himself more. Moreover, improving self-esteem does not at all depend on the results of training: even if the changes are minimal, the activity itself, the process of training itself, is important. The more energetic your workouts, the more you will begin to value yourself. There is an explanation for the presented phenomenon from the point of view of biochemistry: during intense exercise, special substances are produced in the human body -

dopamines

- so-called "hormones of joy." Method number 6.

It is this attitude that subsequently leads to the transformation of character traits and personality traits for the better. Now affirmations are considered by psychologists as one of the most effective ways to reprogram a person’s consciousness.

These verbal formulas are always voiced as an already realized fact, which makes a person perceive them as something inevitable, something that will inevitably happen in any case.

If our own subconscious considers us strong, successful, parents purposeful, then little by little we will certainly become like that.

Main condition when using the linguistic miracle formula - strict regularity.

Method No. 7.

Keep a diary of personal successes and achievements

Sometimes a diary of your own victories and achievements that you create can help raise your self-esteem. This method is especially popular among women. Be sure to get such a diary and enter data there about everything you have achieved during your time., day, a week month

. This is truly a powerful tool that will make you believe in yourself and stimulate your self-esteem.

Let his records be replenished every day with information about your victories, even very minor ones! And don't forget to re-read it regularly.

Use these methods regularly and then your self-esteem will be quite normal, your life will begin to improve, and material problems will move to another level. By the way, don’t forget to read: “”, because without these recommendations it is impossible to gain financial independence.

6. Fighting dependence on public opinion

If you place too much importance on the opinions of others, you are potentially setting yourself up for failure. Of course, really friendly, objective and constructive criticism, pointing out your specific mistakes and received from reliable people who can actually be trusted - this is very useful and will help you develop and constantly improve. But excessive dependence on other people's views -.

this is a huge mistake

Value your own opinion, have your own point of view, act only as you consider necessary, and not someone else. Don't attach enormous importance to other people's words! No one but you knows your true desires, goals, needs and cannot judge what is good for you and what is not. If you want to do something new and different, the question of “what will people say” should never stop you.

7. How to learn to manage your self-esteem and find yourself - 5 useful tips

Let's look at five important tips to help manage your self-esteem:

  1. Don't compare yourself to other people- This is an absolutely futile and stupid exercise. It makes sense to compare only “yourself in the past” and “yourself now,” and you need to focus only on positive changes;
  2. Don't criticize yourself tirelessly, better remind yourself of the list of your positive qualities, achievements and victories (even the tiniest ones);
  3. Socialize more with cheerful, positive people;
  4. Do what you enjoy more often;
  5. Think less! Take more action!

Never forget that you are an interesting, extraordinary person with enormous potential for unlimited possibilities. And only developing good self-esteem is a reliable way to fully reveal your many abilities and talents.

8. Self-esteem test - determine your level of attitude towards yourself

Answer the given questions “yes” or “no”, and then count the number of positive and negative answers.

  1. *Do you often scold yourself for past mistakes?
  2. *Do you like to gossip with friends, discuss your mutual acquaintances?
  3. *You don’t have formed goals and clear plans for your future life?
  4. *Are sports activities foreign to you?
  5. *Do you often worry and worry about trifles?
  6. *When you find yourself in a new company, don’t you like to be “the center of attention”?
  7. *When meeting someone of the opposite sex, do you find it difficult to carry on a conversation?
  8. *Does other people's criticism upset you?
  9. *Do you tend to envy the success of others?
  10. *Are you easily offended by a careless word?

So if you have:
From 1 to 3 affirmative answers - our congratulations, you have good , “healthy” self-esteem.
More than 3“yes” answers: your self-esteem underestimated. Definitely work on this.

9. Conclusion

Now you know that believing in yourself, not being afraid to take risks, not attaching importance to criticism from others and soberly assessing your own talents is entirely possible and not at all difficult. Good specialists with experience in such work will be able to transform a timid, clumsy, indecisive person into a strong, strong-willed, self-satisfied and purposeful person in the shortest possible time.– a sincere, genuine desire to change and a willingness to work on oneself.

You can believe in anything, hope for a miracle, God’s help, luck or a lucky break, but never forget that the most important thing is BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!!!

Having realized this, you, without any exaggeration, can radically change your whole life.

In this article we will consider the following questions:

  1. 1. What is self-esteem?
  2. 2. Why is having high self-esteem so important?
  3. 3. Reasons for low self-esteem.

WHAT IS SELF-ESTEEM?

Self-esteem- this is your attitude towards yourself, that is, how you see yourself, what you think about yourself and who you think you are. All these self-images are formed based on a list of beliefs about oneself. This list contains both good qualities and bad. Self-esteem is not who you really are or how people around you see you. Self-esteem is something WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF?. People don't always think of you exactly the way you imagine. Your level of self-esteem is yours SUBJECTIVE look at yourself. This quality is formed from the very beginning of your life and is done gradually and can be consciously or unconsciously changed.

In most cases, an unconscious change in self-esteem leads to its low level. Why? People are simply designed in such a way that they notice only the bad in a person, always looking for flaws in him, and for some reason all the good is filtered out. Positive qualities are taken for granted. And since more attention is focused on everything bad, of course, it takes root much better and faster in the subconscious, which accordingly affects the attitude towards oneself. carried out through thoughts and actions in different situations. Forming high self-esteem is very important for a modern person. Without high self-esteem, a person is unlikely to achieve anything significant.

Self-esteem is the very starting point from which it begins. If you don't love yourself, then how will others love you? High self-esteem is extremely important, because all your actions will directly depend on it. When your level of self-esteem increases, your level of performance in all areas of your life also increases. High self-esteem leads to confident actions and well-made decisions. Low self-esteem leads to timidity, doubts and, as a result, uncertainty at the time of decision-making. I will comment on this process point by point.

  1. You yourself participate in the formation of your own self-esteem.
  2. Thoughts and behavior correspond to your self-esteem.
  3. The influence of self-esteem directly depends on how others perceive you.
  4. Your self-esteem changes, either positively or negatively, after realizing how other people perceive you.
  5. Let's return to point 2.

FORMING HIGH SELF-ESTEEM DIRECTLY INFLUENCES ALL YOUR ACTIONS, AND YOUR ENTIRE FURTHER LIFE WILL DEPEND ON YOUR ACTIONS.

As Henry Ford said: “Whether you think you can or can’t do it, you’re right in both cases.”.

REASONS FOR LOW SELF-ESTEEM

1. We are surrounded by negative people and very often deal with a negative society.

There are much fewer successful people, but they were able to break through this wall of mediocrity. Why is it so difficult? All because it is necessary to get out of the usual ideas of the masses and trust yourself, and begin your movement at the call of your soul. And this is not very easy. They lie in wait for you at every step, and in addition they indicate to you that you are not going where you need to go. Those people who cannot withstand such stress choose a simpler path - to merge with the crowd and forget about their own. These are the majority of people; society simply takes them away from them.

2. A person's abilities and capabilities, appearance and intellectual potential have been repeatedly ridiculed or questioned by teachers, parents, friends and many other people when a good opportunity presents itself.

No matter how poorly or well you complete a task, there will always be people who will criticize you. They will criticize you either for what you did or for what you didn't do. The main goal of any criticism is to increase your sense of importance. When you come forward, you leave a lot of people behind you, and then they try to bring you down with words. Remember: the level of your success will depend on your level of self-esteem.

3. Giving undue importance to some event in which you failed.

4. Self-promotion

Self-promotion is a short text of a descriptive nature. This text should describe you and your qualities from the best side. Works very effectively in conjunction with technique No. 1 – "mirror". You take a blank piece of paper and write:

“Ivan Ivanovich, meet Ivan Ivanovich, a respectable and influential businessman. He has business in 35 countries around the world. He is among the 1% of the most influential and richest people in the world. A true leader. Ivan has grandiose dreams, he is fluent in self-hypnosis techniques. He has powerful faith in God, in his business and especially in himself. His love is inexhaustible. He loves his job. He loves challenges because he sincerely believes that the more difficulties he encounters on his path, the greater the reward awaits him in the future. He dresses awesome and looks stunning. He has very high self-esteem, thanks to the fact that he knows very well who he really is and what kind of business is in his hands. Every day his business is thriving, and Ivan is becoming more and more perfect, more confident in himself, in God and in his goals. He can achieve absolutely any goals, because with God nothing is impossible. God leads him by the hand.”

After you write the text, read it every day, preferably in front of a mirror.

That's it for the article how to increase self-esteem has come to an end. I wish you success in raising your self-esteem.

How to increase self-esteem, What is self-esteem

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Low self-esteem can be compared to a bad habit: a person understands that it bothers him, but it is difficult to get rid of it. The problem can be found in many people, so the question “how to increase self-esteem” remains relevant.

There are many ways to combat low self-esteem. The article contains rather non-trivial, yet highly effective methods. It’s also a good idea to familiarize yourself with them for those who have good self-esteem (for preventive purposes), and for some people the guide will be the first step to a fulfilling life.

Be able to face your fears

People with low self-esteem have had many situations, the mere thought of which causes panic. It could be a fear of speaking: suddenly someone will say an offensive phrase, another will criticize you to smithereens, a third will reject feelings... Some are even afraid to go out and meet people in order to avoid a potential “failure.” Fears must be fought, otherwise they can seriously ruin your life.

Of course, it is worth thinking sensibly and objectively assessing the risks. But most often the problems turn out to be far-fetched. Nothing bad will happen if a new acquaintance is not interested in communicating. It hurts to understand that sympathy is not mutual, but such feelings pass sooner or later. Moreover, if you are afraid to admit, you may not know that the other person is experiencing the same thing in return.

To become courageous, decisive and self-respecting, you need to take action. Few things can destroy self-esteem more than blindly believing in your own failure. After a series of different situations, an understanding comes - not everything is as scary as it seemed initially, other people are not aggressive, are ready to communicate and are not going to criticize for trying to establish a common language with them. The remaining problems also turn out to be frivolous and far-fetched. It is important not to stop after the first step, to continue towards your goal, rejecting fears.

Learn to say “no” and not feel guilty about it

The advice is far from new, but it really works. The most important part is to stop feeling guilty after rejection. Some people who have learned to say “no” cannot cope with it. There may be a feeling that by refusing a person is letting someone down, deceiving other people’s expectations. But first of all, you should focus on yourself. You can spend your whole life following the lead of others, not paying attention to your own negative feelings.

Another option is to strike a balance between doing for yourself and doing for others. For some cases you have to sacrifice something. However, meeting the expectations of everyone else, forgetting about yourself, means giving up a full, happy life for the sake of those who can take advantage of someone else’s reliability.

Cut off the ties that pull you to the bottom

This advice can be considered a continuation of the previous one. A person who has learned to say “no” to preserve his interests may hear unpleasant things addressed to himself. Friends who constantly asked for help will be perplexed why this time they are refused. If you do something for others for many years, they get used to it and “sit on your neck.” It is very convenient for them - there is always someone to whom they can shift some of the responsibilities.

For many girls, who are accustomed to wearing bright makeup even before going to the store, this turns out to be a difficulty. At first, the thought “how terrible I look” can’t leave my head. “Ugly” appearance without makeup is not an objective reality, but just a factor of unusualness. Seeing yourself in the mirror with makeup every day, and then getting used to the natural look is difficult, but possible.

The girl realizes that she looks good without decorative cosmetics and may use it less often. In addition, it will be useful for the skin to take a break from heavy foundations, blush, mascara, and other cosmetics for some time. The same applies to hairstyles and not the most convenient wardrobe items.

On the Internet you can find advice on changing your image, choosing good clothes, and makeup. The advice itself does not bring anything bad, but it is fraught with hidden danger. If a person feels confident and only likes to look in the mirror when he is dressed smartly and has his hair perfectly combed, this still indicates problems with self-esteem.

You shouldn’t take everything literally and go to the other extreme - look untidy, throw out beautiful things, leaving only stretched out home clothes in the closet. In everything you need to know when to stop. A girl who regularly wears heels or uncomfortable but beautiful underwear will feel relief if she at least temporarily switches to more practical clothes that do not cause discomfort. An even greater joy will be the realization that attractiveness, the feeling of being beautiful does not depend on clothes - it is an internal state.

Do not depend on compliments and criticism

Listening to what others have to say and building your self-esteem based on that is a dubious endeavor. You can often find people repeating the opinions of others. “A colleague said that red hair suits me better”, “a girl says that I look better without a beard”, “my mother is horrified by my new sweater, she advises me to buy a turtleneck”... It’s worth thinking about why people trust others more than their own sensations.

Where does the desire to never wear new comfortable things come from if someone grunts disapprovingly? A person who realizes that his comfort is most important will not worry about the fact that someone does not like his appearance, clothing or behavior. The point is not to protect yourself from criticism, which can be useful and help you progress, but to divide it into objective/subjective. If your boss criticizes an unfinished report, a friend says that your actions are hurting him, and your parents beg you to call at least once a month, you should probably listen and change your behavior. But annoying advice to change your hairstyle, image, or flattering compliments, on which a person literally depends, can be safely pushed into the background.

Be selfish

For some reason, it is believed that a person who knows his own worth and cares about his own happiness is incredibly selfish. If you take these measures, then it is worth being selfish. It is unlikely that a person loses anything when he decides to devote more time to himself, develop, limit himself from unpleasant contacts, and remove unnecessary things from life. But he gets a lot in return.

It is important to find time for yourself, value it and use it wisely, choose your own interests first, and spend resources on yourself. After such a kind of “therapy,” new strength appears, a desire to take care of others, but not to do it to the detriment of oneself.

Learn to perceive loneliness as a plus

One of the reasons for low self-esteem is a feeling of loneliness. When a person has few friends, no mate, a feeling of uselessness arises. But at the same time, loneliness can be turned to your advantage. You should not become a recluse, deliberately doing everything to protect yourself from others. The advantages of loneliness are a large amount of time and free space, complete freedom of action. You can learn languages, dance in front of the mirror, getting rid of embarrassment, read books while lounging on your bed, watch any movies and listen to pop music at high volume.

The most important thing in this is the realization that loneliness is not necessarily boring, and that your own company unexpectedly turns out to be pleasant. Enjoying being alone with yourself is a huge step towards increasing self-esteem. The bonus is self-development and, no matter how trite it may sound, obtaining happiness from the freedom to choose leisure time.

Be prepared for new unusual sensations

Changing the way you perceive yourself inevitably leads to mixed feelings. Sometimes anger may appear: a person does not understand how for so many years he allowed others to dictate to him how to look, communicate, and act. We can say that in this case, anger is to a certain extent justified, just like bewilderment. Taking it out on others and trying to take revenge is a bad option.

It is important to realize that these emotions and feelings are inevitable, but they should not be thoughtlessly thrown out or suppressed. A person needs to comprehend the changes that have occurred and continue to improve his life. The next steps could be new acquaintances, hobbies, changing an unloved job, serious conversations with loved ones, helping to understand each other.

Monitor your balance

Inflated self-esteem is also a negative phenomenon. You should not consider yourself the best, most beautiful and smartest on the planet, disdainfully treating other people. The goal of raising self-esteem is to accept yourself entirely, with all the shortcomings and advantages, to live a harmonious and happy life. The above does not include self-affirmation at the expense of others, deification of the individual and opposition to the majority of people.

There is a big difference between adequate self-esteem and praising one’s qualities, boasting, and immoderate pride. Noticing attempts to rise above oneself, a person should nip them in the bud. In addition, often those who consider themselves better than others actually mask low self-esteem with the other extreme. Happy people do not need to increase their self-esteem by humiliating others.

Some tips seem difficult to implement, but are worth a try nonetheless. A person will not lose anything, but he can gain self-confidence. The main thing is to take your time and don’t give up if things don’t work out. Change is rarely lightning fast; everything needs its time. The main friends on the path to change are persistence, determination and awareness of the desire to make life better.

How to increase self-esteem– the solution to this issue interests millions. Success in life depends on self-esteem. Self-esteem is an individual’s attitude towards his own personality, an assessment of his potential, existing abilities, his social status, an individual’s idea and vision of himself. Those. self-esteem is not a personality characteristic. Interaction with the surrounding society, exactingness, criticism of oneself and other people, and attitude towards successes and failures depend on a correct assessment of oneself. Self-esteem is more often underestimated than overestimated. A significant role in the formation of correct self-esteem is played by the achievements of the individual and his assessment by others.

How to raise your self-esteem

How to increase your self-esteem? Psychology says that it is quite simple if a person wants it himself. What is low self-esteem? Where does it come from? Many psychologists believe that inadequate self-esteem comes from childhood. Very often, parents, without realizing it, form low self-esteem in their children, calling them “blunderers”, “armless”, “clumsies”, etc. For babies from birth, parents are the most significant people in life, they are people from whom you need to take an example and therefore they believe every phrase they say. So if you constantly tell children that they are bad, they will become that way. The child will treat himself the way his parents treat him. Therefore, if your child does something wrong, then you should not call him incompetent, it is better to simply show him how to do it correctly.

However, low self-esteem does not always come from childhood. Sometimes, in an adult, self-esteem can drop greatly under the influence of external circumstances, for example, due to dismissal from work or divorce.

How to increase self-esteem? Self-esteem can and should be increased. If it has not moved to, then there are many ways to improve it. If you become depressed, you should seek professional help.

How can you raise your self-esteem? Psychology advises several proven and fairly simple methods. However, you should not think that the result will come instantly. Also, an excessive desire to achieve a goal can become a kind of obstacle to increasing self-esteem. Regular repetition of exercises and constant faith in your strength will one hundred percent lead to success. If you decide to do something, then you need to start as soon as possible, without delaying it. The longer you tune in, the more your head will be attacked by a stream of obsessive thoughts of a negative nature (“you still can’t handle it, why start?”).

You should try to learn something new every day. Self-education is the most important step towards increasing self-esteem, and therefore, success. If you don’t understand something during a conversation, don’t be afraid to ask again or ask a question. After all, it’s better to clarify several times than to do it wrong once. Your questions will show the other person that you are listening and taking what they say seriously.

We all often hear the phrase “A healthy mind in a healthy body!” And it is true. A healthy spirit determines an individual’s adequate assessment of himself. A beautiful, stately figure, in addition to gaining ease and smoothness of movements, will also give confidence to its owner. Therefore, you should set aside time for daily sports training, you can sign up for a swimming pool. Women are well influenced by changing their image, visiting a beauty salon or hairdresser.

To increase self-esteem, you need a good mood, and a smile contributes to a good mood, so smile as often as possible and praise yourself for all kinds of successes, even the tiniest ones. You can keep a so-called diary where you will record your successes and achievements.

Under no circumstances should you engage in comparisons with other people. Remember, you are an individual unlike others, this is where your strength lies. You can only compare yourself with yourself from the past.

When making any accusations against you, you should never make excuses; you just need to calmly and clearly explain the reasons for your behavior.

Learn to forgive yourself. Remember that there are no perfect people. Everyone makes mistakes.

Be proactive. Even if something doesn’t work out, it’s still an experience.

How to raise a woman's self-esteem

If you underestimate your own value and dignity, do not believe in your strength, then you have several ways to return your self-esteem to an adequate level and increase your own value in your own eyes. This will take some time, but the results are worth it.

How to increase a woman's self-esteem? The main task of techniques and methods for raising self-esteem is the formation of a strong sense of self-worth and self-worth.

Children are often teased at school with offensive nicknames. After many years, children remember the unpleasant emotions that nicknames caused. This is due to the fact that in childhood it is quite difficult to separate other people’s opinions from reality. Adults also often face such problems. Adults attach great importance to the statements of others, allowing them to influence their personality. You need to understand once and for all that it is impossible to please absolutely everyone. The only thing that matters is belief in your strength and potential.

It is advisable for women suffering from inadequate self-esteem to avoid an environment that suppresses them, emotionally drains them, expresses negativity at them, or provokes unnecessary conflicts. It is important to try to spend as much time as possible with people who respect and appreciate you. Communication with them helps to increase self-esteem and help you believe in your potential.

You should not waste time in an environment that constantly criticizes everyone or is dissatisfied with everyone. This will bring you nothing but unpleasant emotions. Such an environment can only destroy the lives of others. After all, such an environment likes to be in conditions of general sorrow. The worse it is for you, the better it is for them. Therefore, a qualitative “audit” of the environment should be carried out. You need to make a list of people with whom you communicate most often. These include colleagues, loved ones, friends and comrades. Ask them to name a few reasons or qualities for which they value you. The more positive qualities your friends name, the easier it will be for you to believe in your importance.

Take a so-called inventory of your achievements. Awareness of your success increases and gives stability to self-esteem. You need to know your positive traits, strengths, personal achievements. Everyone has achievements unknown to others. You should make a list of personal achievements and indicate in it solved problems, crises, experienced conflicts, difficult situations that you withstood with dignity. In the beginning, you probably won't be able to make a long list. Therefore, it is necessary to postpone its compilation for a while and return to it periodically. Try not to lose sight of any difficulty, no matter how small, that you have overcome.

How else to raise a woman's self-esteem? Try to understand that you are the owner of your self-esteem. Only you have rights to it. So don't let anyone control your self-esteem. If you do not become the sole owner of your self-esteem, then you risk being satisfied with yourself only if certain conditions are met. In other cases, you will be tormented by dissatisfaction with yourself or your actions. So, for example, you are in a relationship and your loved one began to behave differently, which led you to a loss of self-worth. This means that you are not the owner of your self-esteem, your loved one controls it. You yourself gave him this right.

It is very important to understand who or what influences your sense of self-worth, only then can you consciously decide whether to allow someone to control your sense of self-worth and worth or not.

How to raise a man's self-esteem

How can a person increase self-esteem? What if this person is a man, who a priori should not have low self-esteem?

The level of self-esteem affects all areas of a person’s life. According to studies, men have more adequate self-esteem than women.

Raising a man's self-esteem is quite possible, but it is a rather slow process. In principle, conscious attempts to build self-esteem are beneficial to almost every individual.

Ways to increase self-esteem are primarily aimed at instilling confidence in your potential. The most important thing on the path to increasing self-esteem is to stop any comparisons of your personality with others. There will always be individuals who are smarter than you in some ways, more successful, who have more of something. If you constantly compare with others, then there will always be too many opponents who simply cannot be surpassed.

The surest way for men to raise self-esteem is sports. Physical exercise helps release adrenaline and makes your figure more attractive, which certainly adds confidence to the stronger sex.

You need to stop scolding your person with or without reason. You will never achieve adequate self-esteem if you repeat negative statements and use negative phrases about yourself and your potential. And it doesn’t matter whether you scold yourself for your appearance, figure, social status or financial situation. It is important to learn to avoid self-deprecating comments. Increasing the level of self-esteem is directly proportional to opinions and statements about one’s personality.

Learn to accept all compliments with a simple “thank you.” When you respond to a compliment with a phrase like “I didn’t do anything special,” you are rejecting the compliment and at the same time sending information to your brain that you are simply unworthy of praise. This leads to low self-esteem. Therefore, you should accept praise without belittling your merits.

Use affirmations to correct your self-esteem. Create a card with positive affirming phrases and place it somewhere visible or frequently used. Such an item, for example, could be a refrigerator or wallet. May these affirmations always be with you. Try to repeat the phrases several times a day, especially before bed and in the morning before going to work. Each time you repeat statements, you need to create a positive attitude for yourself. In this way, the effect of affirmations will be significantly enhanced.

Read more literature or watch training sessions on increasing your level of self-esteem. Give preference to communicating only with positive and successful people. Do only things that truly bring you pleasure. It is quite difficult to feel positive emotions about yourself if your days are spent at a boring and annoying job. Conversely, self-esteem will increase when you are engaged in a job you love or another activity that brings you satisfaction and makes you feel more valuable. If it is not possible to change jobs, then you can devote your free time to your hobbies that bring you joy.

Try to live your life. You will not be able to respect yourself if you live according to someone else's orders, if you make decisions based on the approval of colleagues, friends, and loved ones.

It is impossible for a man to raise his self-esteem by avoiding activity. You need to act and accept the challenges thrown by fate. In cases where you act regardless of the result, your self-esteem and self-confidence will grow in direct proportion, thereby increasing your self-esteem.

Believe that you are a unique person who has a lot of opportunities and great potential. As your self-esteem grows, your true abilities will be revealed. Try to devote time to self-education. After all, knowledge is power.

See how others treat you. After all, the environment is a kind of mirror that reflects your own attitude towards yourself. Therefore, start appreciating your “I” from this moment, without putting it off until tomorrow.

A man's self-esteem depends very much on women. Therefore, if you notice that your loved one has become gloomy, if he has appeared, and he began to consider himself a failure, then try to support him, praise him, give him compliments. Remember, behind great and famous men there have always been women. Beautiful women are capable of giving their stronger half wings with just one smile, one kind word, but also with one careless phrase they can cut off their enthusiasm.

How to raise a girl's self-esteem

In order to increase self-esteem, you must first understand what exactly can take it to a new level in girls. What will make a girl valuable in the eyes of others and in her own? Maybe it's money, a change in hairstyle or overall image, a car or an apartment, new knowledge or acquiring a profession? Is not a fact. Of course, all of the above is a component, but all this will not matter if the girl herself does not love herself. People around you will always be able to tell whether you love yourself or not. Therefore, they treat you accordingly. How can people who are strangers to you, who know practically nothing about you, love you if you cannot love yourself?

Ways to raise self-esteem for girls are primarily aimed at teaching them love and self-respect.

All girls, without exception, regardless of age, breast size and leg length, are prone to periodic dissatisfaction with themselves and their appearance, relationships with surrounding men or girlfriends. During such a period, external confirmation of one’s significance and attractiveness is required to regain lost confidence in oneself and one’s potential. Girls can convince themselves that no one needs them, that no one loves them. They don’t understand how you can love a person if he has small breasts, for example. Then the girls continue to beat themselves up and come to the conclusion that everything is wrong with them. And naturally, in such a state, no one can respect them. Consequently, confidence decreases and self-esteem decreases. And none of the girls thinks that they themselves are destroying their “I” through their efforts. It is necessary to understand that people will see you exactly as you see yourself - dissatisfied with your appearance, always whining, crying, and so on.

How to increase a girl's self-esteem? Learn to love your appearance, try to admire yourself always, at any time of the day. It is important to feel love for your person regardless of your weight, height, eye color or shape, nose shape, etc. Each girl is unique, different from others, a unique personality. Uniqueness is something that remains valuable and is considered important at any age. Think: would you like to come to a party and see your rival wearing the same dress as you? The dress may be very expensive, but it will no longer be exclusive. That's how it is with people. You try to be like someone, constantly compare with the standard you have invented, forgetting that if you become like someone, you will lose your exclusivity. Therefore, do not look for flaws in your appearance and appearance. Everyone has shortcomings. People around you will not pay attention to shortcomings if the girl leads independently and confidently. And independence and confidence are determined only by the love of the fair sex for her person. In order to learn to love yourself, you need to remember that any girl, girl, woman is beautiful a priori. Because every person is exceptional. Such exclusivity is formed by the combination of all its shortcomings, bad and good qualities.

A person consisting of nothing but merits is a boring person. Much more interesting and multifaceted, having both pros and cons. It is the imperfections of the figure and character that give the appearance of ladies a certain amount of charm, charm, adding zest and charm to the image. Imperfections make the fair sex mysterious, enchanting and unpredictable. There is nothing more attractive than a girl full of secrets.

Therefore, love yourself, along with your shortcomings, feelings, aspirations and desires. Try to accept your experiences and never suppress them. This helps to gain control over them, which leads to confidence in one's own potential and actions. In order to love your own personality, you need to learn to respect your personality. However, this does not mean that you should justify all your actions. Justifying bad actions is a step towards losing self-respect. It is necessary to accept the fact that you do not always act correctly, beautifully or correctly towards others. Try not to make excuses for yourself, but simply not allow this behavior to happen again. Learn from all your actions. You need to learn to understand in which situations you are right and in which you are wrong. Don't be afraid to admit your mistakes. The main thing is to try to prevent their repetition in the future.

So, if you feel unsure of your attractiveness, then don’t despair - this is just a reason to take time for yourself, a reason to take care of yourself. Update your wardrobe, get a new hairstyle or change your hair color, try different makeup. If you are not ready for a radical change in your image, then you can experiment with your hairstyle - get bangs or, on the contrary, pin them up. There are many tinting shampoos that will give you a different hair color temporarily.

After changing your appearance, it's time to engage in self-hypnosis. Have you ever thought about the fact that you are constantly programming yourself for negative emotions and your own inferiority, scolding and slandering yourself. Do you really think that this will not affect your self-esteem? In case of any failures, you should not reproach yourself, but, on the contrary, focus only on the positive. Any mistakes are not a tragedy, but just experience. It's up to you whether you repeat them again or gain useful experience. Praise yourself for any successes and achievements.

To give yourself confidence, you should educate yourself. The more knowledge you have, the calmer you feel in any social contacts, since the possibility of getting into trouble due to ignorance decreases, and therefore, the reasons for anxiety disappear. Therefore, do not waste time, sign up for educational courses or trainings, start reading interesting literature, watch educational programs. All this together has a positive effect on the level of self-esteem.

Come up with your ideal image and try to make it come true. Describe on paper all the character traits you would like to have and stick to them.

How to raise self-esteem for the fair sex? There are a few simple rules that you should always remember: no one has ever been born a queen, but many famous women have become queens over the years. Therefore, day after day, remind yourself that you are worthy of great things; part with doubts and fears once and for all, forget about complexes; set goals and achieve them. It is not necessary to start with global achievements. Let the victory be small, but it is yours; keep yourself a success diary; Constantly monitor the flow of your thoughts. Don't let them veer towards the negative; try to smile as often as possible. A smile improves your mood, relaxes and calms you down.

However, following all the above rules will be useless without the support of loved ones. It is the influence and faith of our loved ones that makes us stronger, more confident and better than we are. Therefore, the easiest way to raise a girl’s self-esteem is through the praise of loved ones. You should always praise the fair sex for even tiny achievements. Husbands should praise their wives for a deliciously prepared dinner, even if it is slightly salty, because their beloved tried. Praise girls for their sense of humor, tell them that they are talented, that you appreciate all their efforts and work.

How to raise a teenager's self-esteem

Every person has a sense of self-worth. It is from this that the image of one’s own “I” is formed and a sense of confidence in one’s potential and oneself develops. The foundations of adequate self-esteem are laid in early childhood and depend on how children perceived and felt the love of their parents.

The child should feel that he is loved just like that, without any conditions, just because he exists. Children do not need to do anything striving for achievements and victories in order to receive recognition and love from their parents. Only under such conditions do children develop an adequate sense of self-worth, supported by internal resources.

It so happens that a baby feels parental love only when he meets the requirements and expectations of adults. So, for example, he must always be obedient, put away his toys and his things, and receive only good grades at school. This feeling of love leads to the emergence of internal anxiety due to the need to constantly meet some of the requirements and expectations of the parents. In such cases, a lack of sense of self-worth arises and there is a constant need to feed it from the outside.

People with a lack of self-worth are quite vulnerable in circumstances when they are treated unfairly, undeservedly, when they feel hidden or open, hypocrisy, when their hopes are not met, when they feel disappointed.

It is the puberty period (adolescence) that is a turning point in the life of an emerging and developing personality. And self-esteem in adolescents is their most vulnerable point. The lower its level, the higher the likelihood of the emergence of various complexes that can significantly worsen an individual’s life even at an older age. Parents have a huge responsibility during this period. They are the ones who must help their child in such a difficult and difficult period for him.

How to raise a teenager's self-esteem? First of all, parents of a teenager need to monitor his appearance and try to correct it if he is not in order (for example, very often teenagers are embarrassed by juvenile acne, the task of parents is to help them get rid of the tormenting problem). You should always listen to what exactly the child wants. We need to let him decide for himself what to wear today, choose things for himself in stores. Parents can only slightly adjust their choices and control them unobtrusively. Try to praise your teenager as often as possible. Don’t look for his shortcomings, try to pay attention only to his advantages.

Most parents don’t even realize that they can increase a teenager’s self-esteem by teaching him to just say “no.” If a child cannot refuse anyone anything, then this can lead, after some time, to dependence on other people. The teenager will feel led. Therefore, try to explain in what situations you can refuse. You need to teach him to refuse in such a way that he does not feel uncomfortable.

It is very important that parents respect their children. Treat your teenager with respect, because you need to understand that although he is not yet an adult, he is no longer a child. A person should not be treated like a child. Talk to him often. When communicating with him, try to behave like an adult.

Some simple tips on how to raise your child’s self-esteem. Firstly, you need to learn to praise your child correctly. You should not praise him for what is given to him by nature or for beautiful clothes. Praise your teenager for his achievements, small victories, successes. To make your child feel that you treat him as an equal, ask him for advice more often and ask for his opinion. Secondly, it is necessary to encourage initiative in a teenager. Any initiative is a step towards adequate self-esteem. Teach your child to analyze his mistakes and failures. Help him understand that a mistake is an experience, it is just another step on the path to success.